Oct 24, 2014

Clusterfuck.

SNAFU. FUBAR.

Charlie Foxtrot.

Some of the terms I can associate my life with at this very instant. I wish I could go ahead and post something cryptic yet philosophical, make some smart references, throw in a metaphor or two here and there but the fact will still remain. My life is a clusterfuck.

I am nothing if not a planner and the plan I had for my life has long fallen flat, caught fire and burned to ashes at this stage. I have no focus, no direction, I am ready to go anywhere, but its just that I have no destination. Some may call this living on the edge, taking it one day at a time, but it just makes me feel sorry for myself at the end of the day, for being okay with achieving even something that is close to nothing. Why am I okay with this? Am I really prepared for living my life this way? I don't know.

Its supposed to be the festive season, and I am sitting at home, alone, typing a blog post about how miserable my life is, while I am almost dizzy with the medication for my flu. I don't see the point in dressing up anymore. I don't feel the festive spirit. No one's smiling around me. I have no energy to say anything positive to anyone either.

Emotionally I am not doing great either. I wish I could elaborate. But it'll just make me cry. That's the thing with clusterfucks. Its all haywire.