Why I love Christmas...

Christmas holds a special place in my heart since I can remember. It's not just a festival for me, but a complete season. The atmosphere is buzzing with the festive spirit all around the world, and it times the perfect mark for closing the ends and opening new beginnings. Now before any of you start to think why am I so biased towards Christmas, let me clarify... I have my reasons for why I love this beautiful season!

When I was a little girl, I used to write notes to Santa every year and put them up in my socks every Christmas eve, and the morning excitement knew no bounds :) One year I wrote to Santa to get me a big ol' Christmas Tree, and guess what, I got it! :P A 5 feet long artificial tree <3 I have managed to put up a Christmas Tree almost every year since then, and I decorate it with lots of cotton and all those small gift boxes, and bells, and ribbons, everything!

It's funny that even when the time has changed, and decades have passed by, Christmas still manages to evoke the same feeling in my heart, every year, year after year. I found out who my Santa was, and grew up eventually, but the excitement still remains! Add to it, the weather is beautiful this time of the year, and there is no noise, smoke or pollution involved. The carols playing in the background make you wanna smile instantly, no matter how sad you are.

This Christmas is quite different to me as compared to the last few years. It does mark the ending of an end and the beginning of a new season, of love. It marks the beginning of a new person, a new attitude, a new approach, and a new goal. So this December, I put an end to all the misery and promise myself to remember myself, and cherish the people I love. I apologize to everyone whom I have hurt, knowingly or unknowingly, or have spoken badly of. I forgive everyone who was bad to me, and hurt me or made me upset. I do this because, 2010 was a really bad year for most of the people including me, and I hit rock bottom, but now I have nowhere to go, except up. So here I am, starting on a brand new page, with nothing but smiles and love to give, and forget all the pain and sorrow.

Wishing everyone a Merry Christmas and a very happy 2011 :)
Me.

Tag Time - My Sins Against Gender Stereotypes... Yay!

Thanks for the tag SB :)

Alright, so let me give this a try... Ummm

1. When I was young, and people gave a call at home for some or the other reason, they always thought I was my brother, and vice versa :P [I used to sound like a guy!] I was a complete tomboy, I had very few girl friends and I used to play cricket with the guys every evening!

2. I love taking "panga". I was always notorious. Sure, I looked like this innocent girl who could do no wrong, but only I know how many girls' plates have I studded with pen pencil lead and threw rockets in class and got punished this one time for beating a guy :| [I was a very good student though].

3. I dress for comfort. I don't know if that counts as anything, but I would be rarely seen decking up unless it is a really special occasion and it is absolutely imperative to do so. I have literally gone out with friends wearing bathroom slippers at one point of time.

4. I was, and still am, ADDICTED to WWE. I love watching it! And The Rock is my eternal hero <3

5. I am an absolute gizmo freak! I love having/knowing about different kinds of gadgets and how they work!

6. I have a huge commitment phobia [Which I am not proud of].

7. I love playing games on Xbox and on my PC and also the old classic video game. Yet to get my hands on PS! But yeah I have exploited the PSP well enough so that can wait for sometime ;)

8. I like looking at ladies (Wonder if this counts?). I really feel attracted to the beauty of women. Do not jump to conclusions. Can't girls check out other girls? It is just appreciation!

9. I chose a career path which was comparatively less taken by the average woman! So well, that is another "sin" :P I have had my share of lows and lowers in this field, but right now I am at rock bottom which I think is a good place, coz' the only way I can go from here, is UP :)

10. Last but not the least, I guess I cannot express myself like the usual girls do. I think guys are like that too, I mean I cannot come out with my emotions very easily. Actually I cannot come out with them at all.

So there, 10 sins against gender stereotype! :)
The good thing about doing tags is they never fail to teach you something more about yourself. Stuff that you never knew existed in you! Thanks once again SB!

I tag everyone :D And please leave me a link if you decide to do the tag!

First Impressions

So how important do you think are first impressions?

With the kind of stuff that has been happening with/around me off late, and all the distances and the splits and separations... It only makes me sit and think about the whole episode of how I met that person and how was the journey all along. But every single time I sit and think about anyone, it just hits me right at the start. "Darn, I should have known, the first thing I noticed about this person WAS this! Still I avoided taking notice of this all along!"... "Oh no, I should have known! this was so obvious when I first met her!"... or "I should have known..."

"I should have known"

"I should have known"

I have always been the kind of person who was non judgmental. I believe in second chances, I believe in letting people speak and I love it when people convince me for something that I have been against. I am not a very open person, but yes, if I do find the comfort zone with you, I will definitely go all along. Most of the people who are close to me did not put up very good first impressions. Life is so unpredictable. But like I said, with the things that have been happening, majority of the people who I have been acquainted with have started to prove me otherwise.

I am still trying to balance myself and get a rough estimate on how much to let these first impressions make an impact on me. But with all the retrospection, I get slapped in the face by introspection. A slap so hard that tells me time and again, you cannot change others for certain, but you can definitely change yourself. Don't trust people too much too soon, all they do is screw your life up because somewhere deep down inside, we all are selfish. And some special people, you do not trust them too soon, but eventually you do, and still they screw you over, coz well, they are still selfish. And then there is another category altogether. No matter how much you try to go away, they just always come around. Maybe coz' they really do care...

I think it's time to take chances again. But I think it is important to keep the first impression scanner on too!

Well I know I completely deviated somewhere in the middle, had a dear diary moment there. But it has been so long that I ranted that I'm actually gonna post this! :P

And yeah, do let me know what impression my writing gives out!

6 hours

The longest 6 hours of my life;
Each second seems like a year, each minute feels like one whole life...
The aching heart and crying soul,
Masked perfectly behind this smile,
Mistaken easily by this superficial world,
Are the twinkles in my eyes.

Can’t you hear my silent screams,
Over the distance that draws us apart?
Can’t you see my real dreams,
With the eyes you have deep in my heart?
Can’t you feel the teardrops on your skin,
In the gravity you hold inside my thoughts?
Can’t you smell the absence too,
I feel incomplete without you...

Life seemed so colourful
You made me feel so beautiful
I was your moon in white
You were my star so bright
I was your apple in green
You were the best there could have ever been
10,000 miles of vacuum
Yet you held me so tight

Now I’m just a lonely mess,
Everything just seems so grey,
I don’t want to, but still I guess,
You’re gone, and all I can do is pray.
Please come back , oh please come back,
For you I would lose all of time’s track...
The longest 6 hours of my life,
Each second seems like a year, each minute feels like one whole life...

Nothing Else Matters

So close, no matter how far
Couldn't be much more from the heart
Forever trusting who we are
And nothing else matters

I can see you, right in front of me. But when I reach out my hand, it just passes through you. Are you even real? To a small child, you're the box of chocolates; to a teenager you're that first crush, to an unemployed man, you're his job; to a workaholic you're that sleep, to an aching soul, you're the peace. I yearn for you, I want you, I need you. I cannot have you. But I know one thing, I'm gonna get you! I have always been so unsure of myself, many times, I tried to run away from it, and now when I embraced it, it just made me so sure about everything. It all just made sense.

.... Glad to be back on Blogger after a long long hibernation phase. Missed you guys tonnes! How have you all been doing? I would be so happy if you drop a holla back! Will start posting soon! :)