May 31, 2009

So how do you choose to live your life?


Hello Everyone,

I have been experiencing a lot of negativity around me in the last few days, that includes me too. People are sad, mad, bad, disappointed and full of problems! They're so full of problems themselves that it's very difficult for them to hide behind the fake smile [Yes, I notice that]. And most of these problems have a common point of origin. Ourselves. If we look into ourselves we will find all the cause for how what went wrong. Now that does not mean we start fretting and taking a whole Earth's load on our shoulders, it needs to be handled with care, because many of us get so busy in taking care of others that we forget taking care of our own fragile self. I cannot ask each one of you whats wrong, I don't wanna invade your privacy. Besides, I know you're trying to avoid interaction by keeping your guards up. But I would like to share how some people [including me] deal with issues. It might not help entirely, but if you think of it practically, it might just change your thinking a little bit.

Let me start with myself [I don't spare anyone :P]. I am not exaggerating, but I am a perfect example of "been there done that". Everything that can go wrong in ones life, every mistake that one could ever make, I have done most of it. And I have been sad, mad, and bad too. But in due time, I only realized one thing at the end of each incident. Live your life to the fullest!

I have a million things to tell. I could have done what Kajal did in her blog, say things to each one anonymously. But I have already done that non anonymously in my diary :P So I will just pen down some general thoughts. A guide to live life to the fullest :D

  • Love yourself - Unless you do that, you will never be happy!
  • Love others - Spread love. If you love people, they will love you back. If they don't, they can go die.
  • Have an ambition. Set your goals. Work towards them
  • Accept and Embrace people- No one's gonna change for you, and you shouldn't change for anyone either! [Unless it's a good change]
  • Strike a balance between your mind and heart. Do not mix the two!
  • Accept death. If you know you're gonna die, you will be more motivated while living your life :P Don't be scared!
  • Don't fear change. Change is an important part of life. Learn to adjust.[But don't let people take you for granted!]
  • True friends are important. They always know what is best for you.
  • Learn to let go of things. Life goes on...
  • Try new things in life.
  • Be adventurous!
  • Keep that smile on :)
  • Take out some time off for yourself atleast once in the day.
  • Go traveling alone sometime! Explore...
  • Have a control over yourself. [Money wise, Mind wise and Heart wise :P]
  • Meditate to have mental peace.
  • Remain fit so you can enjoy your life even more and live ailment-free. Take up a sport!
  • Party with friends once in a while!
  • Write a diary, note down things you would wanna look back to when you grow old.
  • You don't wanna feel you missed out on something in life. You have just one life. Live it to the fullest!
Well, during this week I got the news that three of my friends [they know who they are :), not all of them are friends], are on their way to get married.. And I was thinking, mera number bhi jald hi aa jayega! So I have set some goals I wanna acheive or I will not get married :P I'm gonna travel a lot, find new places, explore new cultures and experience a different life in the next couple of years. :)

So what are your plans?! Do you want to live that tension filled life full of worries, or you wanna join me in the Live Life King [or Queen] Size movement? :P

50 comments:

Amal Bose said...

i certainly want to live life kingsize, but the problem is many things mostly depressing things affect me in ways i cannot even imagine and well.. i m not happy at all.. your first point thats what i fail in.. i change myself to make others feel nice abt me and i can rarely say no to any requests.. there are lot of things.. n i think im cool abt almost all other points..
nice topic uve chosen :-)

Ashrita said...

Hey AB!

Well, once you learn to love yourself, you will really not be depressed.. I was like that too.. I changed for every one, I tried to keep every one happy. But it was me who was hurt the most in the end and no one even bothered! Well I consider it as my own mistake. I changed my vision, I look at myself differently now. I'm done changing, I'll make the world change now!

Thanks for liking it :)

Amit said...

I was living life king size till my mom decided its time for me to get married and life has never been the same agains ;)

Cheers,
Amit

Ashrita said...

LOL! See, that is why I wanna travel and enjoy before I get married!

Cheers!

G said...

That reading just made me feel so relaxed! Made me think about a few things. Made me treasure what I have and look forward to what I want to achieve! :)

Yes..Life is not always good. And its not worth the time to see other's perfect life and crib about it either. So just wait and work towards making life better. I have my support which makes me go on everyday. Everyone does. Everyone should! Time really flies! And when I think about what it will be like in another year or so..I get scared :( But then again..life does move on. It always has moved on.

For some reason I am smiling to myself! There a lot of problems..but i so totally want them to fly by!! I am desperately waiting!!! Hope the future brings good news and turns out the way i would want it to! And I will make sure I enjoy and live every bloody moment of it!!! :D

U take care! And dont forget to update your expirience as you explore the world on your blog ;)

Lotsa love!! Mwaaah!!

Ashrita said...

Awww sweetie I wish the best for you! And I know for one thing that YOU would really love to live your life to the fullest.

I forgot to add one more point in there:

Be Patient.

And that's what you are.. Just keep hangin in there.. And life's gonna be amazing at the end of the road!

mysterious gal said...

wow what a post gal...seriously
but i too wish we all can follow all these points...because i know they still i dont follow....wish living life to fullest was so easy .....

but ya even i have the same thing or goals before i get married:P......u must have expected this answer..twins what to do :P
worse is most of my frnds r marrying off......kya itna jaldi kya thi :P

well i too wish i cd balance my mind and heart.....but then i have my best frnds to help me balance them at times and i m glad for that

but seriously i wish we cd love urself more than we love others.....wish i cd because i know i dont love myself much....sighs

i hope someday i learn to live my life to fullest because thats something i truly wanna do .....

Ashrita said...

It's hard to follow them Nabs, but not impossible. I admit I do not follow all of them. But I try to follow as much as I can! I think with you, its more to do with Letting Go... Well I lived my life to the fullest when I met you and we had those series of drunken nights full of nonsense! Haha... You can accompany me on the journey to explore!

Love

A.prem said...

'm following these...i figured them out myself a few months back!!..

Also, watching feel good movies helps.. obv if you are not one of those ppl who go.. oh-god-what-if-i-was after watching those.. lol

People are too busy fretting to realize what they are missing!
I tell my friends these, and try my best to convince them, but some people find peace in cribbing! *rolls eyes* God Bless Them!


nice post ashii.
>:D<

Ashrita said...

I know what you're saying Anu! I had read your post too.. And yeah I agree about some people who prefer to rot in depression inspite of friends trying to help. Later they regret!

Feel good movies are awesome! Like you said, unless they make you go into la la land :P

Thanks for liking it!

Random Thoughts Of My Mind said...

yeah ashi...lots of mistakes done..only thing good i did was loving myself..and dats even after all wrong..m still lively wid good hopes n a better future ahead..at d lst we do lrn sumthng frm d worst even..n i lrn everytime..:)

thanks for d post swthrt..dese points r sum real encouragement..mwah..love ya

Ashrita said...

Polo, as long as you realize it and move ahead, it's all good! By the way I see you're already on a path of living your life to the fullest coz you love yourself, you have let go, and you are all set to rock the world! :)

Love ya

Onward said...

I m with u sugar..live life king size indeed.
I totally agree with ur view on most of the problems stemming from within. Thats so damn true. Think about it. If everyone can be at ease with him/herself..thats half the battle won. You let go of frustrations, worries etc and u feel so much better.

You know i ve got something u should add to your list...READ a lot. Its just as much as fun as visiting a place or watching a swell movie and calms one from within. ;-)

So let the movement roll on..LIVE LIFE KING SIZE.

luv
amith

Ashrita said...

You see Amith, there is a reason why I did not add reading to it! That is coz I put on weight :P I turn into couch potato... So I am going to write down everything that I see... I wanna write a book when I'm old.

But yes, reading is the best thing to enhance your knowledge and there is no such thing as enough knowledge!

Cheers!

Anonymous said...

you are needed.. when ever my friends get drunk and cry about the failures in their life, i can recommend them to give you a call..

Ashrita said...

Chris that works for me! I can preach a lot when I am drunk too! ;) :P

Arv said...

I live it every day come wat may :)

Its the way to live :)

take care mate... drop in a mail sometime... take care.. cheers...

Ashrita said...

I agree Arv! You TC too! Will do...

Cheers!

PULKIT said...

agreed to that you said and told dear!
thanks :)
will try to implement everything thats written here

Ashrita said...

Great to know that Pulkit :)

Anil Sawan said...

Ashrita, have a beautiful eventful life ahead. I wud pray all your dreams come true. and you get a handsome young man who would keep you smilin all life [applies if u havnt found one till date]. njoi ur moments grl.
and yes, i wud definitely want to live life king size.

Ashrita said...

That is so sweet! Sawan, I'm touched... And may you always live your life king size!

Anonymous said...

know wat ... i read this line yday "be yourself.. but a better you is possible too" !! so i was already wondering wat to do in my life wen i read ur post !! thanks !!

god bless all your dreams true ! and when u travel to bangalore, do remember to stop by !!

Anonymous said...

Live life queen size indeed :)
and loved those messages in between..

Ashrita said...

Prats,

I made a note to self : Meet Prats when in Bangalore! :)

Ashrita said...

Kajal,

So glad you loved them! You do know that you're one amongst the three don't you? :P

Anonymous said...

awweee am i? :P

Ashrita said...

Koi shak!? :D

Anonymous said...

tha... but ab? NONE! :D hugsssssss! goodnight Ashri.. muah!

Ashrita said...

Goodnight lovely :)

ARUNA said...

hey Ash, ur goals sound very interesting dear but listen....incase u get married much b4 ur goals accomplishment, do not worry at all bcoz u can do the same even after marriage.......nothing is gonna change, trust me!This is an experienced one talking....lol!
Wat i'm saying is i'm living the life queen size, ofcourse do not deny the worries that come my way....if there is a problem, there is definetely a solution too!

Ashrita said...

Hi Aruna...

I'm gonna do that! If I don't get to accomplish them before marriage, I'll make it a point to do so after marriage :D

May you always live life queen size and dish out a zillion more yummy recipes and keep enlightening us!

Anonymous said...

hey girlie
Glad to b ur blog buddy :)
Loved ur guidelines hon..
"Be adventerous" my fav..
I tel everyone tat m damn adenterous n al tat but when i c a cockroach i dunno from wr tat weird sound comes from but i scream like hell n scare ppl o death lol!
Literally loved ur advice to live life to fullest..
keep rockin :)

Anonymous said...

hey Nice blog.

the real trouble lies within ourselves and the key to the solution also lies somewhere within ourselves. just that we turn ignorant to the light our own inner self can provide....

neeraj_only said...

Me feeling spec'l to be able to com't at my fav blogger's blog

u asked me 2 take chill-pill nd u r worried?

Loved reading gyan 4m ur side :p

Ashrita said...

Hi Sam, welcome to my blog! And you said it right.. It all winds down to just one thing and that is self!

Thanks for liking it!

Ashrita said...

I am not worried :D but yeah I get a little on and off sometimes :P

Anonymous said...

i cant accept death..i cant see my loved ones go away forever..and thats what scares me...:-(
anyways thanks for adding me to your blogger buddies...:-)

pisku said...

This post is so close to my heart! Indeed you shouldn't regret having done (or not done) somethings while you have a choice.
I remember this saying that works for me. There is a gap between what happens and how we respond. In that gap you can choose how you live your life.

Ashrita said...

Well said Pisku :)

ZB said...

i understand and appreciate what you are trying to convey. Its all too important to love oneself, otherwise its not possible to love anyone. However, loving oneself also sounds very selfish and taken in a negative way.i thing 'empathy' is all too imperative in today's world. Cheers:)))

coffeeismypoison said...

Interesting question Satan's Darling...
How DO i choose to live my life?
With goodness and kindness...with compassion...occasional ranting and raving :o) But i am inspired to write out a full post on this.
As for marriage, I cannot wait...you'll understand why if u read the post below :o) Read and tell me if u changed ur mind in the slightest....!

http://acuppaconversation.blogspot.com/2009/04/honeymoon-travels-and-more.html

Ashrita said...

I agree Zillionbig, loving oneself can result into selfishness too. We need to know where to draw he line!

Cheers!

Ashrita said...

Coffee,

I read your post, and I have been through it too. Over 2 years of living in, umpteen vacations and everything else! But yes, the fun of exploring the world alone, it's different altogether. It's like what Anu said in her blog. 3 kinds of trips. One alone, one with friends, one with the man you love.

And then once you get married, other than just living all the time with each other, there is another load of responsibilities altogether you know, family wise. There is definitely "tying down" even after giving each other space and all that, otherwise there would have been no difference between single and married life :)And if there isn't, then I would be glad to take that vacation one more time with my husband! :)

coffeeismypoison said...

@Satan's Darling : Hmm...I do get what ur saying...Perhaps i don't feel the need for travelling n spending time alone for self discovery because i've done it...maybe not worldwide but the self discovery part...which is more important...whether u discover urself alone, travelling, drinking coffee by yourself, watching movies in the theatre alone...I've done all of that too...so i know...now...that i can marry...[well not for the next 4yrs ]...
i guess u cud say, a part of my self discovery was with my Better half.[he's more than just a bf :)] I've been with him since i was 21...he is a very insightful guy and he helped me grow so much.
When I go by myself, anywhere...or if he does...things just feel incomplete. when i was single, 5yrs ago, it didn't...now...i look for him...he sees me in every girl he sees. We wonder what the other would think of this or that...
I hate travelling...but he loves to...I like seeing new places, just hate the journey...he loves it and he swears he'll make it comfy for me too :)

I know, he knows, things change after marriage. a LOT. But we're looking forward to those changes too. A lot of ppl i know dread them. I know things will be harder, maybe...or maybe not hard per se but just different from what we're used to. but it'll be fun, going on that journey with him. Then again, hes my best friend above all else. I cant imagine marrying anyone else. THAT is Shit SCARY.

Ashrita said...

Oh I get your point there! You need to marry I see now :D

Well, traveling alone, for me, has nothing to do with self discovery. It is more about finding out new places, meeting new people, learning about new cultures and loads and loads of carefree shopping :D But in the process one does polish oneself as per the different kinds of people they come across. That is good, it's growth. I am lucky to have traveling as a part and parcel of my job profile, that too for free! :D

And probably after having done all that, I will post once again : NOW I cannot wait for that marriage! :o)

Ashrita said...

Oh and yes, sometimes in that single phase, people just barge into our lives and little do we know that they would be the be all and end all in due time :) Wishing you both a happy life and a great future together!

Kavita Saharia said...

nothing is planned when you are busy living your life........but at different points of life when you look back you feel that everything was preplanned for you(totally my experience).i wish all your three friends happy Days,years ahead and you lady.....live life just the way you want it AMEN....GREAT BLOG...ONE MORE FOLLOWER

Ashrita said...

Thanks Kavita and welcome to my Blog :)

Miss Sunshine said...

phew.. some thought people have given to it.. :P
and yea, i agree with you. take it in your stride basically. :D